THC Ministry :: Community Forum Index
WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    THC Ministry :: Community Forum Index -> Jokes, games and funnies
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
indicaspice
Cannabis Sacrament Minister
Cannabis Sacrament Minister


Joined: 16 Nov 2003
Posts: 615
Location: somewhere on earth

PostPosted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 10:45 pm    Post subject: WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN Reply with quote

To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own,
grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something to make you
chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the
thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.
After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first
thing he said was "DON'T!"

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.

"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have forbidden
fruit!!!!!"

"No Way!"

"Yes way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.

"Why"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why He
hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later, God
saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you?" said the Father.

"I don't know," said Eve.

"She started it!" Adam said

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve
should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never
changed.

BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and
they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising
children, what makes you think it wou ld be a piece of cake for you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and
talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for
word what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself
that there are children more awful than your own.

6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing
home one day.

AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO
WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:

"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"
_________________




when life hands you a lemon, make lemonade
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Rev. Bob
Cannabis Sacrament Minister
Cannabis Sacrament Minister


Joined: 15 Dec 2003
Posts: 307
Location: SE Ireland

PostPosted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 11:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing
Laughing
_________________
Rev. Bob

Use the Cannabis as a Sacrament ;
http://www.thc-ministery-eire.tk

http://www.3mz.utvinternet.com
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Buddy
senior member
senior member


Joined: 20 Dec 2003
Posts: 104

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 1:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

grins
_________________
Fear Ends.
Hope Begins.
Kucinich in 2004.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
machete
Honourable member
Honourable member


Joined: 22 Jan 2004
Posts: 217
Location: Ecuador

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 3:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

rofl rofl
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Lilli
Cannabis Sacrament Minister
Cannabis Sacrament Minister


Joined: 12 Dec 2003
Posts: 2613

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 3:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

roflmao roflol roflol roflol roflol
_________________
"2 Corinthians 1:12 - For our boasting is this, the testimony of our conscience, that in simplicity and sincerity before God, (not in fleshly wisdom but in God's grace,) we have had our conversation in the world, and more abundantly towards you.' Over the oil
http://www.missouri-thc-ministries.tk
" I pass to you the torch that Christ once passed to me,others are still in the dark an need the light to see"
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Echo
moderator
moderator


Joined: 14 Apr 2003
Posts: 856
Location: UK

PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 9:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote


Now... this was a good one Laughing claps roflol

Schools closed due to bad weather, I have 7 (seven) children at home right now Wink

_________________
'You, your joys and your sorrows, your memories and your ambitions, your sense of personal identity and free will, are in fact no more than the behaviour of a vast assembly of nerve cells and their associated molecules,' Francis Crick (1916~2004)

Kent THC Ministry
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
Kate
Cannabis Sacrament Minister
Cannabis Sacrament Minister


Joined: 31 Jan 2004
Posts: 220
Location: boynton beach, florida

PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2004 10:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

lol-so true! lol
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Yahoo Messenger
BabyBuD
senior member
senior member


Joined: 21 Dec 2003
Posts: 112
Location: in my own little world

PostPosted: Thu Feb 05, 2004 4:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

lol that was crazy lol Laughing
_________________
~BabyBud~
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Yahoo Messenger
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    THC Ministry :: Community Forum Index -> Jokes, games and funnies All times are GMT
Page 1 of 1

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Public forum Public Forum Members only Members only forum Members Group Members Group

THC-Light skin designed for THC Ministry by JuggoPop of Touchstonestudio.com
Powered by phpBB | THC Ministry Members | Cannabis Religion | Sacrament | Forum html archives |
ScriptWiz.com phpbb HTML Archiver - Created by ScriptWiz.com and released by Skinz.org