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Web Hell: It's been a hell of a year...

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Joined: 31 Jul 2004
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Location: Cleveland

PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 12:45 pm    Post subject: Web Hell: It's been a hell of a year... Reply with quote

For those of us who delight in such things, the twentieth century has, in its unfolding, presented mankind with an array of behavioral paradoxes and moral conundrums hitherto unimagined and perhaps unimaginable. Science, traditional enemy of mysticism and religion, has taken on a growing understanding that the model of the universe suggested by quantum physics differs very little from the universe that Taoists and other mystics have existed in for centuries. Large numbers of young people, raised in rigidly structured and industrially oriented cultures, violently reject industrialism and seek instead some modified version of the agricultural lifestyle that their forebears (debatably) enjoyed, including extended communal families and in some instances a barter economy in miniature. Children starve while boots costing many thousands of dollars leave their mark upon the surface of the moon. We have labored long to build a heaven, only to find it populated with horrors.

It is the oldest ironies that are still the most satsifying: man, when preparing for bloody war, will orate loudly and most eloquently in the name of peace. This dichotomy is not an invention of the twentieth century, yet it is in this century that the most striking examples of the phenomena have appeared. Never before has man pursued global harmony more vocally while amassing stockpiles of weapons so devastating in their effect. The second world war--we were told--was The War to End Wars. The development of the atomic bomb is the Weapon to End Wars.

And yet wars continue. Currently, no nation on this palnet is not involved in some form of armed struggle, if not against its neighbors then against internal forces. Furthermore, as ever-escalating amounts of money are poured into the pursuit of the specific weapon of conflict that will bring lasting peace, the drain on our economies creates a rundown urban landscape where crime flourishes and people are concerned less with national security than with the simple personal security needed to stop at the store late at night for a quart of milk without being mugged. The places we struggled so viciously to keep safe are becoming increasingly dangerous.

The wars to end wars, the weapons to end wars, these things have failed us.

Believe it or not, that's from a comic book: The Watchmen, by Alan Moore released all the way back in 1986. (Comic books are a small passion of mine and one of the things I hope to build, eventually, is a library of comics and other subversive fiction.)

In the meantime, the fact that a 20 year old work of art is speaking so truthfully about today's military speaks volumes as to the importance of a Ministry of Art and Music. For this will allow us to preserve our culture through maintaining creative lifestyles by allowing us to employ ourselves in our own Art & Music Schools, Libraries, Galleries, Museums and Workshops.

There is a direct connection between creativity and the shamanic arts, allowing us to examine the impact of creativity throughout history via the study of mythology and folklore. As handiwork and craftsmanship is replaced with technological efficiency, as policy becomes more important than people, our hands-on involvement is vital to the preservation of our own humanity.

Writers, Artists and Musicians, boundless in their insight, energy and expression, make it possible to predict the state of things to come by paying attention to what creative people are feeling. By volunteering your time to nonprofit ventures like mine, you are able to take an active role in the preservation of our way of life.

I've been at this for little more than a year now. I started this nonprofit venture with nothing more than a free webpage and a bunch of information to put on it. And then I spammed the hell out of it. With the few connections I could make that actually took me seriously enough, I was able to assemble the beginnings of a caring network and co-op. Which, for all intents and purposes, seems to be taking me into some remarkable directions.

Taking full advantage of the nonprofit status, I've subsisted for the last year on less than a hundred dollars (cash) a month. The rest has been done on service exchange and bartering. As the network grows it will be able to acquire property of it's own at which point more volunteers and/or employees will be able to devote to it the time necessary to allow it to expand. If other non-profit ventures agree to associate with this one, we will be able to provide assistance on a level so far unseen in this age of technological advancement and mass government waste.

I started off as a lowly internet spammer to prove a point:

The internet allows to network and exchange our ideas more openly. We can hide safely behind our pseudonyms in order to express outlandish ideas that we'd never share in public. Uninhibitedness, so essential to the creative process, can now be applied from the very beginning of any venture and we can be free to associate with eachother and seek eachother out on the basis of mutual interest and belief alone.

This, in turn, could have lead us towards great feats of understanding and acceptance if we'd only put our mind to it. Instead, we use it to antagonize eachother in chat rooms and mailing lists and distract ourselves by dividing into teams so we can attack eachother in virtual domains. At this very moment, many of us are using this Web Hell for nothing more than to live out our most violent and perverse fantasies instead of allowing ourselves the all-important progress that this invention should be leading us to.

Furthermore, as governments and other agencies pick which parts of our private lives to legitimize, we pick amongst acceptable behaviors in order to pigeon-hole ourselves into a more acceptable mode of oppression. Networking to play board games and card games and putting together scrap books and logging on to satisfy carnal urges and addictions or to blow away a 9-year-old who's playing on a virtual combat team half a country away is okay, but to even suggest get together to help eachother with anything that interrupts the government control of health, education, social work and political action is considered nothing short of cultism, terrorism and perversion.

We've filled Web Hell with so many of our personal demons that we no longer believe anything we see here. Distracted by our own vices, we may occasionally find ourselves expanding on more creative and worthwhile ideas...only to fall short when it comes to trust. We've revealed so much of our darker selves and pretended to be so many things and have so many pretenders out there that many of us don't believe in anything we find on the net anymore.

Without ever considering that in a world where everyone has an opinion, every observation holds some kind of truth.

We've endeavored to reduce life to less than a 5 second soundbyte. Television and Radio, which were supposed to revolutionize the entertainment industry, now has more commercials than entertainment value. And now are considered more dangerous than fun. Just like the internet.

With everything I have on my website about spirituality, politics and the importance of building a caring network to support a community school...and because the average attention span prevents anyone from reading anything more than a few snippets of it at a time, it took me more than a year of spamming to find two people that weren't looking for sex or drugs or who didn't think I was some kind of a scam.

I was informed yesterday that I'm suddenly in the midst of a deadline. Though I, personally, have been blessed with the patience and perseverance of a man with a mission, this whole thing has impacted the most my friends and family. My family has tried to have me committed and my friends have jobs and family to think about. I started this myself because I'm a single man without a future, I've got nothing to lose, and it would be too much to ask for anyone else to make any more sacrifices.

I have finally begun to wear on the generosity of some of what I consider to be my closest friends. I am grateful that this has lasted as long as it has, and never expected them to hold out this long. But, a deadline is a deadline. In a few month's time, the venture has to start supporting itself, which means acquiring a property that will allow my volunteers to work, or I will have no choice but to disappear.

Real Life is waiting. I've sold off everything I own except for the necessities that have allowed me to live thus far. Everything else has gone to helping those that have been helping me with this nonprofit. My last day of societal life will be to sell off the rest and hit the road with what I can carry. I fear that if this isn't strong enough to pay its own bills by donations and community interest alone, in a few month's time it will disappear forever. For I know of no one else with a futureless life like mine to devote themselves to it full time.

Handing this over to someone else who can finance it is by far the best option. But I can't do that until people start to step up to the plate and take their best swing at whatever lopsided fastball I can toss them.

I built this network on people that the system considers useless. These people either have no jobs or are only marginally employed. Some of them have families, but all of them have some kind of skill that they can contribute. This venture has cared for myself and for dozens of others in the past year, and it was done with little to no money at all. It was completely done on networking and on volunteer interest alone.

This proves without a doubt that money is not necessary for happiness. It only makes things easier and provides the people of the bureaucracy the illusion that they're doing something with themselves. If this fails it's because of nothing more than a human lapse of faith.

If we continue to get together on the internet...if we continue to start as many of these nonprofits as possible and get them to work together, maybe someone else will be able to succeed where I fall short.

You have to get off the net in order for the net to work for you. I cannot emphasize this enough. This can prosper if enough people believe in it. But if all you do is log on, all you do is sit still.

I cannot over-emphasize the importance of other people's Real World Involvement at this juncture. Whether you're a big person or a little one, near or far, no matter how useless or stuck you might be, you are now essential to the operation of this organization and in a position where you can help.

I'm not asking you for money, I'm not selling anything. I'm giving this away and I'm asking for your help--Real Life Help. Your time and your skill.

Everything I know and everything I've done is on my website. You need to read it and you need to understand it if you expect it to work. If you don't understand, ask a question. If you want to do more, help out. But if you want to get started on your own and you feel you need my help, you need to ask for it soon. Because now my time is limited.

Anyone, anywhere, anything you're able to provide is welcome.

I'm at the Phoenix Coffee House in Lakewood every Tuesday and Saturday at 8pm. Our next fundraiser is on July 15th, at Cyber City (featured artist to be announced). For more information, please check out my website at

Here's to burning one down with god.
Don't forget to look behind you every once in awhile
and always exhale with a grin.

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