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Smart answers...

 
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Echo
Cannabis Sacrament Minister
Cannabis Sacrament Minister


Joined: 14 Apr 2003
Posts: 989
Location: UK

PostPosted: Thu May 08, 2003 7:08 pm    Post subject: Smart answers... Reply with quote

Snappy Answer #1
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and opened
his trench coat and flashed her.

Without missing a beat she said,
"Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."



Snappy Answer #2

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but
couldn't find one big enough for her family.

She asked a stock boy,
"Do these turkeys get any bigger?"

The stock boy replied,
"No ma'am, they're dead."



Snappy Answer #3

The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding pulled
down his window.

"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.

The kid replied,
"Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."

When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a
ticket.



Snappy Answer #4

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads
"low bridge ahead." Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of him and
he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles.

Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks around
to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says,

"Got stuck,heh?"

The truck driver says,

"No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."



# 5, THE TEACHER Snappy Answer OF THE YEAR

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.

"Now class, won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might
consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in
your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"

A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asks,

"What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter
sexual exhaustion?"

The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When
silence is restored, the teacher smiles sympathetically the student, shakes
her head, and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with
your other hand!"

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"Men of few words are the best men" William Shakespeare (1564~1616)
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